What is a McKenzie Friend?

A McKenzie Friend is a person who supports a litigant in person in court by taking notes, helping with paperwork and offering practical and moral support. They are not a solicitor and do not provide legal representation unless the court grants additional rights.

Can I go to family court without a solicitor?

Yes. Many people represent themselves in UK family court as litigants in person. Bridge The Gap shares community observations and resources to help you understand the process. It does not provide legal advice.

What is Bridge The Gap?

Bridge The Gap is a community-built platform by litigants and McKenzie Friends that highlights the gaps between what people assume about family court and what actually happens.

Divorce & Legal Separation

Looking for help in your family court proceedings?Bridge The Gap is a free, community-built guide to UK family court, written by litigants and McKenzie Friends, for litigants. Real observations, plain English, and people who can help.

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Subject Guide

Divorce & Legal Separation

Divorce is a legal process, not just an emotional one. These are community-shared observations about the gaps between expectation and what is commonly seen in practice.

Want support with this?

A McKenzie Friend can help you navigate divorce & separation in family court.

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Divorce & Legal Separation

Assumption: The divorce is nearly done — we can sort the finances out afterwards.

Assumption: My ex stopped paying the mortgage. I can apply to court and they will make him pay his half.

Assumption: This AI divorce tool will help me work out my settlement. It even has a UK calculator.

Assumption: The other parent verbally agreed to pay half the nursery fees but is now refusing. Can I enforce that?

Assumption: My husband is not disclosing his assets. Can an accountant help me find out what he has?

Assumption: If we both agree to delay the final divorce order until finances are sorted, we do not need a court order — a verbal agreement or undertaking through solicitors is enough.

Assumption: The final divorce order can be granted before finances are resolved — it does not affect my financial claims.

Assumption: I am being dragged to court to have my character defiled. I am the one being bullied here. My refusal to engage is self-defence.

Assumption: Once the divorce is final, everything is sorted.

Assumption: A verbal agreement about money is binding.

Assumption: The paperwork of the divorce is the hard part.

Assumption: I don't need to worry about pensions in the divorce.

Assumption: Doing my own divorce means doing it entirely alone.

Assumption: My spouse being cooperative during the divorce means they're being transparent about finances.

Assumption: We lived together for three years before we got married. That time doesn't count — the marriage only started on the wedding day.

Assumption: I'll have to go to court to get divorced — it's going to be a long, stressful process in front of a judge.

Assumption: I can just use an AI tool to guide me through my divorce — it'll keep costs down.

Assumption: I’m getting half his pension — I can use it to buy a house.

Assumption: We lived together for years before getting married — we have the same rights as a married couple.

Assumption: My ex spent all our money after we separated. The court will just add it back.

Assumption: The court is a neutral space — once we separate, he has no power over me there.

Assumption: regarding the new government consultation "Live together three years and they automatically get half"

Assumption: regarding the new government consultation "Cohabiting will be treated the same as divorce"

Court fees are what they are. If I cannot afford them, I cannot go to court.

Assumption: If we can't agree on how to split pensions, do we both have to agree to instruct a PODE?

Assumption: My ex made no financial contribution, so they should not get anything from the assets.

Assumption: Once my divorce is final, I can remarry straight away and sort out the finances with my ex later.

Assumption: The court will reduce my ex's share of the assets because of the abuse during the marriage.

Assumption: We moved abroad years ago, so I cannot get divorced in England — I am stuck with whatever the foreign court decides.

Assumption: Casual texts or emails about who gets what from the house don't count, only a formal signed document matters.

Assumption: If I contact a family lawyer, I'll have to commit to getting divorced right away.

Assumption: The value on my annual pension statement is what my pension is worth for the divorce settlement.

Assumption: Once we're divorced, that's it. My ex can't come after my money or assets later.

Assumption: My pension and my ex's pension are worth the same if the paper values look similar.

Assumption: Where you divorce is just an administrative detail — what really matters is where you married.

Assumption: Money I've built up since we separated doesn't need to go on my D81 because we agreed I could keep it.

Assumption: Divorce splits everything 50/50.

Assumption: If the house is only in my name, it's mine.

Assumption: Pets get decided like a child custody case.

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